A parent’s love for their child is beautiful, but it’s not always healthy. A codependent parent in one’s youth can impact them for the rest of their lives. Below is a list of signs to look for when searching for codependent parenting. If you recognize any of your own behavior on this list, it may be worthwhile to look into family therapy. A professional can help you address the real cause of the parenting codependency problem.
At Oceanfront Recovery in Laguna Beach, we are proud to offer comprehensive, high-standard mental health care alongside our substance abuse treatment programs. Codependency parenting can be addressed in cognitive-behavioral therapy, family therapy, or a mix of the two. Our dual diagnosis approach allows us to work with you on your addiction and any outstanding mental health issues in a way that works for you. Every client is an individual with their own set of needs, and we are equipped to accommodate them. For more information, call us today at 877.296.7477.
5 Signs You Might Be a Codependent Parent
1. You feel the need to control minute details of your child’s life.
Many codependent parents insist on controlling every aspect of their child’s life. This can include your child’s career, relationships, and hobbies. The severity of this level of obsessive control can be very detrimental, and it becomes more damaging the older your child is. A child needs to learn to make their own choices, and you must make peace with not being in charge.
2. You resort to passive aggression or guilt trips in order to get your way.
Everyone says things they don’t mean from time to time, and this is especially true of arguments. However, when you continually use manipulative tactics during these fights in order to get your way, you’re doing a great disservice to the entire relationship. Making your child’s choices about yourself and your own feelings through guilt trips or martyring yourself is never healthy and is a major sign of codependent parenting.
3. You treat your child as a main confidant or source of therapy.
Your children, especially minors, should never be your first source of emotional support. When you feel the need to vent or seek guidance on an adult issue or conflict, don’t use your kids. Speak to a therapist, a religious leader, your partner, or a friend. Your children will grow up better for it, and the advice you receive will likely be much more valuable.
4. You are protective over your child to the point of restricting the opportunity for growth.
No one wants to see their child be hurt or fail. The unfortunate part about that truth is another universal truth: Your child will be hurt, and they will fail. It’s a natural part of anyone’s life, and there is no way to protect someone from every single source of potential harm. A certain level of protectiveness is expected in a parent. Still, if you are restricting your child’s activities, interests, or opportunities through that protectiveness, then you may be causing genuine harm.
5. Yelling is an important strategy for you.
Although many studies suggest that yelling at children causes lasting psychological effects, losing your temper from time to time is understandable. Emotions can become volatile before you’re aware of it, and you may yell without meaning to. However, if you use shouting as a technique to control your child or influence their behavior, that’s a sign of codependent parenting. It’s not an effective way to raise a child, and it can push them away more than you may think.
Access Family Therapy at Oceanfront Recovery
Our wide variety of therapy options sets Oceanfront Recovery apart. Family therapy is just one of many offerings, and our customized approach to substance abuse recovery and mental health could be the key you’re looking for. If you believe that a codependent parenting style may be influencing an addiction, don’t wait to ask for help. Call us today at 877.296.7477, or visit us online for more information.